Nobody Knows I'm Gay! Unisex Sweatshirt

Nobody Knows I'm Gay! announces the secret in rainbow lettering with the subtlety of a drag queen entering through the front door.

The joke is perfect because the sweatshirt destroys its own premise on sight. Bold rainbow text says the allegedly private thing out loud, turning closet humour into something knowingly ridiculous and warmly self-aware. It works especially well for the newly out, the very obviously out, and anyone whose idea of discretion has historically included Pride flags, ex-boyfriends and a brunch reservation for six men called Ryan.

This funny gay coming-out sweatshirt is made for first Prides, queer bars, winter brunch and anyone who enjoys pretending their sexuality remains classified despite overwhelming visual evidence. Wear it under a coat for a dramatic reveal or let the rainbow text stay fully exposed. A sharp gay Pride crewneck for somebody whose secret is safe with absolutely nobody.

Nobody Knows I'm Gay! Unisex Sweatshirt Product Details

• 50% cotton / 50% polyester
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Classic unisex fit with no centre crease
• Soft air-jet spun yarn to help reduce pilling
• Rib-knit collar with spandex for comfortable stretch
• Double-needle stitching at the collar, shoulders, armholes, cuffs and hem

Sizing Guide

The measurements below are the actual sweatshirt dimensions, so compare them with a crewneck you already love rather than relying only on the letter size. Choose your usual size for the intended classic fit, go up if you want a roomier or more oversized silhouette, or size down if you prefer it closer to the body.

If you are between sizes, check our Measuring Guide before ordering. Please allow a manufacturing tolerance of approximately ½–1 inch on both length and width.

Imperial Sizing Chart

Metric Sizing Chart