It's Not Pie Organic Cotton Apron

It is not pie. Fine. We are still bringing whipped cream.

The It's Not Pie Organic Cotton Apron is an organic cotton kitchen apron featuring rainbow heart graphic. The apron celebrates LGBTQIA+ pride and self-expression in a professional kitchen. It takes the It's Not Pie design and turns it into practical queer kitchenwear with enough personality to work before anyone has even tasted the food.

The design works because it sounds like actual queer conversation rather than a Pride-month committee meeting. The joke, identity or reference is specific enough for the right person to clock immediately, ideally while stealing something directly from the chopping board.

The kitchen version of It's Not Pie is simple: season boldly, taste constantly and never let a beige casserole become the straightest thing in the room.

Wear it for dinner parties, Pride brunch, baking days, barbecues, date nights or the ordinary Tuesday meal that deserves more personality.

This lands somewhere between a funny queer apron and a genuinely useful Pride kitchen apron. Gift it to the queer cook, baker, host or barbecue menace who deserves a camp LGBTQ+ cooking gift with more personality than a tasteful Pride flag in the corner.

Under the camp is a genuinely functional 100% organic cotton apron at 7.08 oz/yd² (240 g/m²). Adjustable back straps and the roomy two-compartment front pocket make it useful through prep, cooking, serving and the inevitable clean-up. There is no approved body for queer domesticity. Hairy, soft, muscular, flat, curvy, scarred, changing and beautifully ordinary bodies all get to cook.

It's Not Pie Organic Cotton Apron Details

• Original Queer In The World It's Not Pie design
• 100% organic cotton
• Fabric weight: 7.08 oz/yd² (240 g/m²)
• Adjustable back straps for a comfortable fit across different body shapes
• Updated streamlined neck strap without the buckle shown in some older product photos
• Large front pocket divided into two practical compartments
• Ideal for Pride brunches, queer dinner parties, baking, barbecues and everyday cooking
• A sharply specific funny queer apron or camp LGBTQ+ cooking gift
• Useful protection against flour, grease, sauce and overconfident whisking

Each apron is made especially for you after you place your order. Producing pieces on demand rather than in bulk helps reduce unnecessary overproduction, so thank you for choosing a more considered way to shop.

Size guide

Cook loudly. Season aggressively. Serve cunt.